Shadows Disappear In The Tall Reeds of The Coconut Grove - Candle

Shadows Disappear in the Tall Reeds of the Coconut Grove—The Candle

I was in the middle of the ocean. Adrift in my typical, "What even is life?" ritual. 

I have this strange, nonsensical idea that if I can just center myself under the moon, directly in the middle of the ocean, everything will be fine. It’s irrational, I know. But I’ll take any weird trick that chills out my upcoming panic attack.

It was the second to our last night in Thailand together. Baby was busy getting engaged to a fire-dancing magician.

She flew in from Texas two months prior and packed two bags. She pointed to one and said, "That one’s for Thailand. We’re going."

And I said, "I know."

She didn’t believe me. Why would one? I was a mess. I had been dumped (see: Shadows of a Former Flame candle), and I felt like a weird oscillating zombie.

So anyway, we go to Thailand. We land in Chiang Mai. Well, first, we drank vodka on the plane and got in a fight about Drake. I’ll never question Baby’s love for him again. I fell asleep on her shoulder.

The rest of the few weeks devolved into a series of unhinged adventures. We fed elephants banana bunches in the morning (ever so ethically). We went to a Monkey College where I learned how they are trained to retrieve coconuts (ethically). I rode a longboat by myself one day, accidentally to James Bond Island. I went in a bat cave. I ate a freshly caught fish I had just called cute, and it was delicious. I let the water waterboard me for the two-hour ride back while I worked on my posture. I didn’t speak to anyone for 10 hours. I got back to the rainforest and I cried for my ex-love. The monkeys were so loud, and I was so upset he never wanted to do any of this with me. I swung wildly between being thankful for Thailand, and for Baby Texas, and wanting to sink into the ocean endlessly and forever.

We played cards. It was Baby’s favorite part of the trip. A million miles away from any normalcy, and it reminded her of home.

She rented a motorbike and we went to the top of Thailand. It was too windy to light a cigarette. We swam around in our pool at night. We imagined somewhere off in the ether, everyone we ever loved who had passed was all hanging out together and having a good time. We saw a shooting star. It was Baby’s first. I’m pretty sure it was Jack and Dawn.

I let a stray cat into our room. I missed my dog. I missed my former life. I tried to keep my panic attacks at bay.

I still have a hard time believing any of it was real, but I tried to make a candle that reminded me of this time. This one’s for Baby Texas. Friend that comes and whisks me away from my life when I feel like dying. Baby Girl, interrupting.

Shadows in the Tall Reeds of the Coconut Grove is your friend that does this. Shadow friend that buys you an entire carton of American Spirits duty-free. That takes you to a Monkey College when they hate monkeys. That lets you dance and sweat at a weird Euro dance club in Thailand when they hate dancing.

Walking back to the hotel now. The tide has gotten high and it’s the only way back to our place. I long for one last Tong Cho (solar dog) sighting before the night is over. I’m all underwater; even my bag is submerged under the sea with my body. What are things? Tomorrow we fly to Bangkok. Where I’ll see Bubba—my OG brother from a million years ago that’s working on an installation in Bangkok. I’m so proud of him.

I will love the airport the next day. Baby Texas will pitch me on trying to date John Mayer for some reason. I’ll hit up a guy on Instagram before falling asleep. We might fall in love eventually. I’ll get home, and my home will be different.

The Scent of This Candle

This candle smells like Thailand. It took five thousand trials, but this was the one. The one that carries the lemongrass and swaying grasses, the mosquito bites, the ocean salt, the cats sneaking into your place, the warmth of humid air, and the night you swear you’ll remember forever. It smells like the beginning of something. Or maybe the end.

Top Notes:

Lemongrass, Salt Air, Bergamot

Heart Notes:

Jasmine, Coconut, Orchid

Base Notes:

Driftwood, Tonka Bean, Amber

11oz | Veggie Soy Wax Blend | 50-hour burn time

Lovingly hand-poured in Los Angeles, California.

Listen While You Burn

This candle comes with a curated playlist to deepen the experience.

🎶 Listen Here